Monday, April 21, 2008

Baby: A Brief Pregnancy FAQ

Cousin Jenn has quite rightly suggested that I post Childbaby's expected arrival date, since I've been less than reliable in keeping everyone properly informed of such matters (one of the reasons this blog is now up and running). So here is a brief FAQ:

Q: When's Childbaby supposed to come?

A: Due date is 23 April, which is -- good Lord -- day after tomorrow.

Q: Think it'll happen on that day?

A: Nah.

Q: If not then, when?

A: Well, we have an appointment on Friday. If nothing's happening by then, the plan is to induce labor on Tuesday, 29 April.

Q: Didn't you expect this baby to come early? What was with all the mid-pregnancy hype about colossal fetuses and so on?

A: Well, see, the Asperger's-afflicted doctor who conducted the first ultrasound told us that the baby was in the 90th percentile for weight, that Sophia was eating way too much sugar (even though she doesn't eat sweets) and that the fact that I weighed 11 pounds at birth could only be attributed to the fact that my mother was diabetic (untrue). It didn't help that the doctor who did the second ultrasound told us that the baby was in the 97th percentile for weight. So we spent those two weeks thinking that the world's largest child was growing inside poor Sophia -- until we saw this doc again and he told us he had meant to say 79th percentile, not 97th. Even so, it seemed we were in for a whopper, but every measurement since then has been closer to normal. We're still expecting it to weigh around 9 pounds, but it probably won't be the monster we thought it would be earlier on.

Q: Do you know whether you're having a boy or a girl?

A: No. Do you?

3 comments:

Molly said...

Can I just say- avoid induction as long as possible. Seriously. I suppose if you're planning on doing an epidural it might not matter- but if you want to try not to- I do NOT recommend induction unless absolutely necessary.

The Blogger said...

Molly, have you been induced?

Anonymous said...

I have. It stunk.